It was a chilly day, but not too cold to avoid the Tobacco Barn two days before Christmas 2014. I had a wild idea that it would be cool to postpone all Christmas purchases until the week of Christmas and to purchase locally.
(The reality of this possibly was a sheer panic attack ... apparently AVL, as cool as it is, has not reached the shopping pinnacle I've come to expect in Rome. Who knew.)
The good news is that I was able to come up with a truly unique gift for each person ... barely. There is something to be said to let the gift speak to you instead of going out for a particular item. However, do not try this if you live anywhere in the United States other than very large metropolitan cities or very weird places.
I digress.
There it was. A beautiful little ... record player. Whatever they call them. My mother LOVES records. Between her and me, one could be drowned in the number of record players and vinyls. This, my friend, does not make a person an expert on the age of music via very large black discs with needles on them to play music. FAR from it, as I was about to find out.
I take it home victorious. It was older than I've ever seen other than ... well, places that don't sell them.
However, it turns out that pre-technology is really confusing. Firstly, I look for the plug. There's no plug! My husband points to the crank and I nearly die. I have to crank it? How does that even work? He broke it all out and showed me, and replaced a few parts along the way for better sound quality. I was mind blown. Something works without electrics? I vaguely was aware that life existed some how before Edison, but it was never clear to me.
Then, there are the records. It took us scratching up several LPs before Google was checked out. Guess what folks, there are a lot of record types. Research indicated that 12" 78s were required. The hunt began. The hunt failed [insert lots of time here] with the music sounding really weird and the arm crushing the record. Then, the ever so valuable question was finally asked among three people that, combined, have six educational degrees to demonstrate our lack of critical thinking. This was the question....
Would a record with Elvis work on a record player that was made before Elvis was born?
This is not a trick question, although it took several moments to digest.
Off to the antique shoppes.
Turns out that traveling record players from the 1920s and 1930s require graphite records, and not just any graphite record. Not the Edison graphites. No no no no. It's spun differently. I feel like I could win at Jeopardy under the category "Useless Knowledge".
Three months after Christmas, my mother finally gets her gift. This is what happens when you just try and "pick up cool gifts during the week of Christmas", and yes, I learned A LOT!
The family has been greatly entertained though, especially Elle....
USELESS facts that might serve you well in the Zombie Apocolypse and as well as facts that will never be found in one handy place when YOU buy that perfect gift stuck under a bunch of antiques expecting it to work perfectly (because why wouldn't it!)....
- You should change the needle after each record.
- You can't play newer records on older players....ever.
- You CAN play older records on newer players.
- The winding on a non-electric player needs to be "let out" on occasion.
- It's best to use the needles from the same company that produced the record (kind of like you're forced to use Apple's charger if you want their iPod......)
- People actually still sell the parts. Really. Not making that up.
- There are handy YouTube videos that provide detailed instructions on how to clean the parts, which isn't too hard when you realise there are like only 12 pieces inside that makes this thing work.
I was informed by colleagues that allowing our daughter to select any place she wants to go in the world for her birthday is really setting her future spouse up for disaster, which didn't particularly hamper the continuation of said practice :)
There were several benefits of Paris: it wasn't a 36 hour flight, we actually knew that city a bit (and love it), and Eric and I could strike out for a nice road trip in Europe once my parents returned Ellie back to the States....bonus all around!
